Defining Beauty

“Let’s teach our daughters it’s not about being beautiful. Teach them to be bold. Be silly. Be strong. Be confident. Be independent and intelligent. Be brave and be fierce. Be real in a world full of fake. Let’s redefine Beauty.

~ Author Unknown

In 2018, I introduced my teens to Project Beauty. It is a movement with one simple message:

You are beautifully and wonderfully made.

I feel strongly that our worth and beauty isn’t contingent on perfection; our journey, and even our “flaws” make us unique, strong, beautiful.

But that is a message that gets lost in our every day lives, doesn’t it? The media and our society feed us a standard of beauty that IS based on perfection.

And that is a lie.

I wondered though, as a photographer, if I feed into that lie a bit? I DO encourage my girls to pamper themselves by having their hair and make-up professionally done, and I retouch my images to remove “imperfections,” like pimples or dark under eye circles. 

I mean the experience to be a fun departure from the stresses of every-day life.  We play dress up, and I work hard to be sure that my girls look like themselves on their very best day.

My job is to capture their essence.

What I mean by “their essence” is, that when we speak to a person, we engage with who they are, and won’t usually notice if their skin is broken out, or if their hair is out of place… so I DO fix those things in my images as well.

My goal is that my teens see themselves as I see them, as the ones who love them most see them.

It is my personal philosophy is that our worth and value comes from something much deeper than our outer shell.

When I came across “Project Beauty,” it was like seeing my mantra given life.

Genuine, Real, Raw, Beauty

So for a third year, I asked my Senior Team to push themselves past what was comfortable, and allow me to photograph them with simple hair and zero make up. Only moisturizer and lip balm were allowed

On my end, I would do no touching up, outside of transforming the images into black and white.

Then, in order to receive their photos, my teens agreed to two things:

 1.     Write a few sentences describing what true beauty means to them.  I asked them to be raw, and real.  I asked them, if they were willing, to share their insecurities, to share their struggles, and to convey a message of hope.  I told them that if they have a struggle, chances are there are others that do as well, and when others hear their story, they may feel heard and understood.

 2.    Any time they share their photographs from this shoot, they will caption it, either with what they wrote for me, or with another quote that describes TRUE beauty

Covid-19 cancelled our 2020 shoot, but if you missed the powerful messages from 2018 and 2019, you can find them by clicking here and here.

As for Team 2021, well, their wisdom blew me away.

Brysen, Brunswick Academy:

“Is true beauty what you see on the outside of an individual or is true beauty within the person their self? I personally feel beauty is within an individual. Beauty is how you carry yourself, the respect you have for yourself and others, as well as how you treat people. Respect, morals and values show one’s true beauty.

I was taught to love myself and to be a confident. My parents taught me that I had to love myself before others could love me, and a person could be gorgeous on the outside but if their attitude was negative then that changed their outward appearance. From a young age, they have always told me, “you have to love yourself.” Growing up, this advice, along with their encouragement, taught me how to love myself and have massive self-confidence indeed. Throughout elementary and middle school, I was overweight, but my self-confidence was undeniable. I loved myself just the way I was, held my head high, and kept a big smile on my face.

I think high school is difficult for girls because we begin to judge how our bodies look and compare our bodies to others. Still, thankfully my preestablished self-confidence helped me embrace my body and be comfortable in my skin. I see so many people struggle to love themselves, and it makes me very sad for them, but it also makes me thankful that I was taught to love myself.”

Jordyn, Roanoke Rapids High:

“True Beauty To Me Is…. always helping others. From a young age I was taught to always lend a helping hand if you can. When I was asked what is the most beautiful thing about me, along with other people who agree, I would say my heart. I am the friend who always answers the phone and helps with whatever I can. If I have it and you need it, it is now yours. If you need anything and anything at all I will always find a way to provide. I love to help people in anyway possible, and that is what true beauty means to me.”

Taylor, Roanoke Rapids High:

“I feel as if the world today has a way different view of what beauty truly means. With all of the social media and editing, every girl today tries to compare to that.

Beauty to me isn’t about the way you look. It doesn’t matter if you have flawless skin, straight teeth, or a perfect body. Beauty to me is a light that shines from within and can even, at times, lift the spirit of those around you. It’s all about the way you treat people, your sweet soul, and kindness.

I myself used to have a hard time being comfortable in my own body but I have learned that I am perfect the way I am and that you just have to kill the negative thoughts that come to your mind and embrace your true beauty.”

Nelia, Brunswick Academy:

“True beauty is more about an energy that radiates from you and wraps itself around, infiltrating the hearts of others. It is the ability to prioritize someone else’s wishes above your own. It is a gesture of inclusion, a smile shared, and the words that travel from your lips to echo in the ears of all that surround you. Only those who are confident and aware of their self-worth can truly step outside of the boundaries of their own insecurities and doubts to be a light or touch the heart of another which in my opinion is the epitome of true beauty.”

I hope you were inspired by Team 2021… I know I was.

XOXO,

Lymarie